.I Am a Proud Vegetarian. There. I said it.
So. I think I can officially call myself a vegetarian (or a pescetarian, technically). I have now
gone almost 7 months of my life without eating any meat. (insert applause sign here). I
don’t foresee this changing any time soon. And it feels really, really good.
Now…I have dabbled in the idea of vegetarianism for most of my adult life. I am a
passionate animal lover. Actually…that is an understatement. People that know me well
have questioned my sanity at times when it comes to my love for animals. And ever since I
have been conscience of the fact that when I am eating meat, I am eating an animal…I
have not been entirely comfortable with being a meat-eater. But I am also an actress, and
I can be really good at pretending when it ‘serves me’. (A quality I am trying to expel from
my personal life completely, because I now realize that pretending to be something you
are not can never actually serve you).
As much as I love animals, I have also always loved eating meat. I grew up on hearty steak
and potatoes, juicy hamburgers, colossal hot dogs, and (my favorite) sizzling fatty bacon.
I am not ashamed to admit it. I loved meat.
Eating meat was also always connected to something deeper for me. Nostalgia. Quality
time with my family. Saying “fuck it” and living life to it’s fullest by indulging purely in
sweet, uninhibited desire. Immediate gratification. So, despite my love for animals, I
always found myself going back to eating meat whenever it pleased me. Finding it really
easy to simply ignore my true desire to respect this planet and it’s beautiful creatures. I
would say that I was 90% vegetarian, but if there was ever a plate of meat in front of me, I
was the first to also say “Screw it. Yum. I’m not going to deny myself something that looks
that good! You only live once.” A walking contradiction, was I.
Then something shifted. I became more educated. I stopped allowing myself to be
ignorant and decided to actually absorb the plethora of information that was surrounding
me. Now, I have been very fortunate to have Rachel Avalon (a holistic health nutritionist,
‘green’ expert, and godess of the earth) as one of my best friends for years. Her presence
in my life has been a constant source of positive influence when it comes to my health,
mind body & spirit. Doing her cleanse (TheAvalonCleanse) changed my life. Truthfully. It
was where I first began to listen to & honor my body. It was where I first understood what
it meant to treat my body like a temple, because it is. It is our sole instrument. The only
thing we have to live from. Rachel’s influence has taught me how to have a relationship
with my body. A concept I am still learning to embrace and fulfill.
Then everything else started to trickle into my consciousness. I began to learn about other
aspects of vegetarianism. Discovering that having an emotional connection to animals
(which I feel so deeply) and a newfound respect for my body & living a health conscience
life (we can no longer deny the connection between vegetarianism and living a lasting,
more vibrant life) were not the only reasons to ban meat from your diet. There are major
political, environmental, and spiritual findings as well. Studies and statistics and
compelling arguments that scream as loud as the cute little Babe as he is forced into the
slaughterhouse to be chopped into tasty little pieces (forgive me for going there, but it’s
Now I am not going to preach here. I would not know how. I will leave that to the experts.
There is still so much information out there for me to take in. I am still, and maybe forever
will be, just a humble student in this matter. Trying to live my live with as much integrity
as I know how. I only bring these other reasons up, because this is what changed me for
good. Realizing that I didn’t just believe in one cause to be a vegetarian, but ALL of them. I
thought “What am I doing? Who am I?? There is no part of me that believes it is ok to eat
meat. I am living a lie.” So I decided to stop. And commit to not eating animals, because
that was what my true self wanted. There are so many other ways to spend quality time
with my family and reminisce on my childhood. So many other sweet pleasures to indulge
in. Pleasures that don’t involve sacrificing my core values. Sacrificing my self. Pleasures
that authentically allow me to live my life to it’s fullest.
I am not perfect. On a weekly basis, I am faced with temptation. Luckily, now I see every
temptation as an opportunity to listen to what I really want, how I genuinely intend to
live…and act in alignment to the values I hold most dear. I now find myself struggling with
the decision to eat fish. Exploring and hoping to bring to light how I really feel about it.
Investigating to see if eating fish is yet just another way in which I am acting out of
ignorance. And being a vegan? Me?! I don’t think I’ll ever be able to commit to that fully. I
just love cheese too damn much. And you don’t have to kill an animal to eat cheese!! That
helps my justification. As of now. ;)
But as my dear friend Rachel says, “It’s about progress, not perfection.” And as I write this,
nibbling on a raspberry filled dark chocolate Ghirardelli Square (which we all know is not
the healthiest snack to choose on a Monday afternoon, but damn is it scrumptious!), I am
reminded that I am a perfect (haha) example of this. Progress. One step at a time.
If you are reading this, please know that my intention in sharing these thoughts is not to
convince you to become a vegetarian. Every person is entitled to there own insights,
feelings, decisions, and actions. I do not think that ‘if you eat meat, you are an evil
person’. Heck, if I thought that than a majority of the people I love most dearly in my life
would be evil! I am a firm believer that it is our differences that make us all so beautiful. I
also believe that as different as we all may seem, at the core, we are in actuality the
same…but that is a whole other tangent!! All of that being said, my only intention in
writing this blog, or whatever it is, is this:
I hope to encourage you to ask yourself how you really feel. Educate yourself. Challenge
your beliefs. Ask the hard questions…the questions that scare you and may potentially
change life as you know it (possibly for the best?). Refuse to live in ignorance.
That’s all. Easy as that. Ha!
Thanks for reading my first attempt at a blog entry. Scary to post this. To expose this part
of myself and express some of my most inner truths. But face the fear, right?! YES.
I’ll leave you with the link above. It is to an article that brought me to tears. A reminder of
why it is that I choose to not eat meat, at the heart of it all…